April 04, 2013

The Life That Changes You

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My dearest baby girl just breathed her first fresh air last week.
Through hours of long labor that didn't seem to go anywhere and finally ended up in the operating room, the moment she cried out loud and breathed her first fresh air I knew, this is going to be  a brand new life for me. And it all started from day 1.

1. It doesn't make you less of a mother
Although determined to have a normal delivery, I wast first disappointed that no signs of delivery is coming as the due date is getting closer. Decided to do it with induction which ended up in failure since no signs of opening though the contraction already felt like the baby's coming. Then the obgyn made a late night call, "we need to do it via c-section otherwise the baby will be stressed out", which felt like a second disappointment. But hey, I guess at that point of time, I just want the baby to see the world. And the next day I realized, doing a C-section doesn't make you less of a mother.

2. You knew it's not going to be smooth, but who would've thought it's going to be this tough
Having a firstborn baby, being a new parent, those are new things for me. I knew since the first day of pregnancy that it's not going to be easy. I've heard stories of midnight tantrums, less sleep and rest, limited flow of breast milk on 1 or 2 days after delivery, no more time to do what you used to do and other stuffs, but when you think about all the other fun stuff you could do seems like there's no need to worry. Who would've thought all the fun stuff will come a little bit later than sooner, and guess what happened, day 1 after delivery, still in bed for c-section recovery, no signs of overflowing breast milk, a baby crying for milk in the middle of the night for 5 hours. I was in shocked, didn't the nurse said that babies don't get hungry on their first to two days after delivery, then why is my baby crying so much to be fed. Sure thing it almost gave me baby blues, all the comforting stories were all lies, but then you just gotta boost the mood, this too shall pass. Luckily few days later, each one of us (the baby, the mommy, and the daddy) is getting better at playing our new role.
 
3. Whatever happens this is a new team you are cheering for
For a long while there, it was you, your mommy, your daddy, and your siblings. Then there were the honeymoon times when you made your own little nest and it was just the "two of us" (you and your hubby). Now there's a new life you need to take care of. Ain't the first always the most memorable. Not knowing what to do, doubting whether you are doing it right, stressing out over not knowing a thing and ended up doing nothing, lacking of rest, all this could pick up a fight real soon within the team. Whatever happens you just gotta remind yourself that this is a new team you are cheering for. Praise the baby for not having a tantrum due to late crying respond, understand the daddy for awkwardly cradling the baby, and give yourself a pat in the back each time you successfully make the baby sleep without a hassle. 

Babies did not asked to be born, instead they were a result of adults selfish act. So when yhe do come, let's get our act together and be responsible enough to bring joy to this newborn life.

 

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